Sunday, December 11, 2005
Unruly Kids During the Holidays
Holiday activities are the best times for observing children at their best and worst. The child's awe and simple trust in the big man in red or in seeing colorful lights while imagining reindeer pulling a sleigh through the sky is a beautiful thing to experience.
Demanding greed, resistance to direction, increase in aggressiveness and overeractive wildness are also themes of children's behavior during holiday activities. While a child may behave similarly at other times of the year, the spotlight of intensity seems to be more evident during this season.
There are good reasons for this disruptive behavior. Grownups surround children with expectations about what gifts they might want. They then use the gift-giving hopes to coerce the child into behaving appropriately for weeks before the arrival of the gifts. "He knows if you've been bad or good," for goodness sake.
Kids schedules are disrupted with shopping jaunts, additional babysitters, participation in parties, gift sharing, increased sugar intake, disappointments of unfulfilled expectations. Nothing is more painful than watching a dressed-for-the-cold, exhausted child being pulled along the shopping center highways by a good-intentioned grownup who is fulfilling some inner demand for getting a gift list completed. I wonder what the big person in this scenario would feel and do if they were put in the child's place. So let's put some sanity and stability to the process of surviving the holidays with your children.
Tips and Reminders
1. Evaluate and release the demands you are putting on yourself and, as a result your children, for holiday activities. (Notice who is making that demand on you and decide which activities support you in your current life. Make alterations accordingly.)
2. Design activities that are short-term, fun and without demands for perfection. (Overstimulation is a major issue. As soon as the child is no longer engaging with interest, move on to another activity or rest time.)
3. Keep the child's schedule for eating and sleeping consistent. (Even when there is a babysitter, require consistency as best you can.)
4. Limit sugar and carbonated drink intake. (Keep the diet nutritionally balanced.)
5. Maintain special cuddle, reading, and play times with your child. (It will support you in taking a break from the anxiety-ridden "should list" playing in your head and provide provide the quiet come-down of overstimulation.)
6. Continue these tips and behaviors all year round.
Have a satisfying and gratifying holiday season.
Party brightens kids' holidays
Kids need help with food choices, too
Demanding greed, resistance to direction, increase in aggressiveness and overeractive wildness are also themes of children's behavior during holiday activities. While a child may behave similarly at other times of the year, the spotlight of intensity seems to be more evident during this season.
There are good reasons for this disruptive behavior. Grownups surround children with expectations about what gifts they might want. They then use the gift-giving hopes to coerce the child into behaving appropriately for weeks before the arrival of the gifts. "He knows if you've been bad or good," for goodness sake.
Kids schedules are disrupted with shopping jaunts, additional babysitters, participation in parties, gift sharing, increased sugar intake, disappointments of unfulfilled expectations. Nothing is more painful than watching a dressed-for-the-cold, exhausted child being pulled along the shopping center highways by a good-intentioned grownup who is fulfilling some inner demand for getting a gift list completed. I wonder what the big person in this scenario would feel and do if they were put in the child's place. So let's put some sanity and stability to the process of surviving the holidays with your children.
Tips and Reminders
1. Evaluate and release the demands you are putting on yourself and, as a result your children, for holiday activities. (Notice who is making that demand on you and decide which activities support you in your current life. Make alterations accordingly.)
2. Design activities that are short-term, fun and without demands for perfection. (Overstimulation is a major issue. As soon as the child is no longer engaging with interest, move on to another activity or rest time.)
3. Keep the child's schedule for eating and sleeping consistent. (Even when there is a babysitter, require consistency as best you can.)
4. Limit sugar and carbonated drink intake. (Keep the diet nutritionally balanced.)
5. Maintain special cuddle, reading, and play times with your child. (It will support you in taking a break from the anxiety-ridden "should list" playing in your head and provide provide the quiet come-down of overstimulation.)
6. Continue these tips and behaviors all year round.
Have a satisfying and gratifying holiday season.
Party brightens kids' holidays
Kids need help with food choices, too
