Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Relax During the Holiday Hubbub
Making a list and checking it twice? Make sure that you and your well-being is at the top of the list. Abiding by the many expectations and rituals that surround the holiday activities can drive one to being over-anxious, exhausted, and feeling as though you have not done enough, done it good enough or that you are simply not enough.
These tensions lead to over-doing without knowing when to stop, over-eating as you try to fill the emptiness and grab quick energy, and over-spending on people and gifts that are beyond your means and beyond necessity. Take a look at your lists and ask yourself whether something is authentically important and pleasurable for you or is it a "should" that has been passed on along your life history. Bring forward a conscious adult you to make new choices based on your current life values and means.
Re-evaluate the importance of your patterns and look to alter those that are no longer necessary. Experiment with letting go of and altering some of the rituals just to test their emotional impact. You are always the interpreter of your reality so design the interpretation and reality that best serves you now, in this current life situation and as a conscious adult. If you have not re-assessed your patterns, they most likely are those designed and promised by the child and adolescent you.
Re-evaluation List
(Who is the character in you who is emotionally attached to this activity?)
1. Holiday decorations--tree, the house, outdoor, neighborhood competitions, shopping mall tours, etc.
2. Food rituals--sweets, meals, dishes, dinners vs. visits with people, alcohol or not, etc.
3. Gifts--family, friends, clients, support staff, fellow workers, neighbors, mailperson. (number of gifts, dollar limits, quality of gifts, re-gifting, etc.)
4. Holiday letters and greeting cards--(number, letter and/or card, email letter, formal vs. informal, just sign or write a note, who to send to, etc.)
5. Gatherings--family, friends, neighbors, work, before vs. after the holidays, etc.
Write down as many of the details of your current practices and consciously re-evaluate for pleasure and necessity. Experiment and notice your responses. For example, can you allow yourself to receive a gift without having to give one in return? Have you scheduled "down-times" for yourself and your family?
Keep a written copy of your experiments and your responses. Next year, add to the list of changes and allow yourself to explore even more. What we are able to bring to the level of conscious choice gives us an authenticity of self-expression and loving.
http://ww5.bhg.com/story.jhtml?storyid=/templatedata/lhj/story/data/StressbustersNaturalUP_06162004.xml&ordersrc=goog3health0805
http://www.self-guided.com/newsletter/RT-2004-12-02/htm
These tensions lead to over-doing without knowing when to stop, over-eating as you try to fill the emptiness and grab quick energy, and over-spending on people and gifts that are beyond your means and beyond necessity. Take a look at your lists and ask yourself whether something is authentically important and pleasurable for you or is it a "should" that has been passed on along your life history. Bring forward a conscious adult you to make new choices based on your current life values and means.
Re-evaluate the importance of your patterns and look to alter those that are no longer necessary. Experiment with letting go of and altering some of the rituals just to test their emotional impact. You are always the interpreter of your reality so design the interpretation and reality that best serves you now, in this current life situation and as a conscious adult. If you have not re-assessed your patterns, they most likely are those designed and promised by the child and adolescent you.
Re-evaluation List
(Who is the character in you who is emotionally attached to this activity?)
1. Holiday decorations--tree, the house, outdoor, neighborhood competitions, shopping mall tours, etc.
2. Food rituals--sweets, meals, dishes, dinners vs. visits with people, alcohol or not, etc.
3. Gifts--family, friends, clients, support staff, fellow workers, neighbors, mailperson. (number of gifts, dollar limits, quality of gifts, re-gifting, etc.)
4. Holiday letters and greeting cards--(number, letter and/or card, email letter, formal vs. informal, just sign or write a note, who to send to, etc.)
5. Gatherings--family, friends, neighbors, work, before vs. after the holidays, etc.
Write down as many of the details of your current practices and consciously re-evaluate for pleasure and necessity. Experiment and notice your responses. For example, can you allow yourself to receive a gift without having to give one in return? Have you scheduled "down-times" for yourself and your family?
Keep a written copy of your experiments and your responses. Next year, add to the list of changes and allow yourself to explore even more. What we are able to bring to the level of conscious choice gives us an authenticity of self-expression and loving.
http://ww5.bhg.com/story.jhtml?storyid=/templatedata/lhj/story/data/StressbustersNaturalUP_06162004.xml&ordersrc=goog3health0805
http://www.self-guided.com/newsletter/RT-2004-12-02/htm
